Monthly Archives: April 2008

Why I hate my children

My neck is officially wider than my head. And lumpy. My neck is lumpy. Because there are two golf balls sticking out of the side of it just behind each ear. My throat is swelling shut. It’s starting to get … Continue reading

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100 Things: The Final Chapter

Raise your hand if you’re relieved this Ode to Miss Britt series is finally coming to an end? OK, that’s rude. Put your hands down. I’ve spent 9 of the last 10 weeks rebuilding my “100 Things” list. I think … Continue reading

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Why I Cling To Hope.

I know no one wants to hear anymore about politics. I know. Let me, instead, tell you about my broken heart. I am 28 years old, born in 1980. I have heard stories about the 70′s. I’ve read about the … Continue reading

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Snackiepoo – Clearly, You’re Retarded

Monday, Hilly wrote a post that broke my heart. Confessions of a Blogger Who Is Not A Mommy was an interesting look at what adult women who have not had kids encounter in their relationships with other women.  It hurt … Continue reading

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Pissed.

If you missed the Democratic debate last night, let me bring you up to speed. First half hour: total bullshit Second half hour: total bullshit Oh, wait… was that an issue in there? Nope. Sorry. That was a commercial break. … Continue reading

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Everything I needed to know about sex I learned at the bowling alley.

This conversation may or may not have recently been overheard in a bowling alley somewhere in Central Florida… Husband (channeling Beavis): Heh. Look at your score. Heh. Wife: Yes, I know. You’re beating me. Again. Husband: Heh. Heh. No. Look. … Continue reading

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In Which I Become The Envy Of The Blogosphere

You all doubted me, didn’t you? There’s no sense in denying it, I know it’s true. You read my very well thought out proposal to the marketing gurus and you scoffed. You laughed! You called me a whore! Well, well, … Continue reading

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In Which I Call Forth A Mountain Of Swag

I don’t know if you noticed, but I have recently had my big coming out party with The Mommy Bloggers. I wore pink pajama bottoms and we served Cosmos in sippy cups. The moms can really hold their booze. It’s … Continue reading

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The Review That Gets Me On The PR Blacklist

One of the “perks” of pretending to be a moderately popular blogger is that you can convince authors and publicists to send you free stuff. Well, free books anyway. I’m still waiting for someone to send me free shoes. But … Continue reading

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Shhhhh….

I decided about two months ago that I would do a series. 100 things about me. 10 things a week for 10 weeks. Today is supposed to be the final installment of that series. But I’m just not feelin’ it. … Continue reading

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