If it wasn’t for Photoshop, you would not FEEL my pain

I have prattled on and on and on talked a lot about The Move. And the differences. And God help you all… I’m going to do it some more. But this time, with visual aides!!

(Ha! I. Have. The POWER!!! (and shame on you if you do not get the He-Man reference there))

In Iowa right now:


In Florida right now:


Of course the Iowa clouds are going to eventually produce a constant dreary autumn like drizzle. And our clouds will sporadically, with no warning or reason, produce buckets of rain. And then sunshine. And then rain. Like a freaking curAZY person!

In Iowa right now:


In Florida right now:


OK, Iowa. It is possible you win this one. But only because there is a Red Tide in that water right now which makes it a little difficult to actually go into the water. Well, technically going in to the water is fine. Coming out without a burning pain in your eyes and on your skin is a little more difficult.

But whatever. Trivial, trivial.

Out the back window of a nice little Iowa home right now:


And, out the back window of a nice little house in Florida:


Oh yeah. They did.

A 13-foot, 800+ pound mutherfucking ALLIGATOR. (don’t use caps, it “sounds” like you’re shouting – I am fucking SHOUTING! ALLIGATOR! BIG FUCKING ALLIGATOR!)

Now, granted, I haven’t figured out exactly how close to my house they found it. But when the news reports that it was found IN. YOUR. TOWN. that is pretty fucking close enough for me.

The only thing scarier than this:


Is this guy:


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