Because I remember Michael Office

Dear Internetz,

My two year old’s “teacher” (or “lady in charge at the daycare”) has informed me that my daugther “has a boyfriend”. His name is Brandon.

Apparently, whenever Brandon walks in the room, little Emma squeals and dances and cries “he’s here! he’s here! he’s here!”

Of course my immediate response was to smile and say “oh goodness, that’s cute, kids these days” and maintain the appearance of total apathy. Because duh, she is TWO.

My next step, however, will be more calculated. And I would appreciate your guidance and advice. Because everyone knows the Internetz is way smarter than real people.

Should I…

a. Try to pump further information from the daycare providers about how Brandon responds to sweet little Emma’s interest? Does he notice her? Does he appreciate her? Does he realize he is the luckiest little toddler in the entire freaking WORLD if that girl so much as LOOKS at him twice?

a1. Follow up question – if further prying reveals that this little boy is brushing poor Emma off and clearly not worthy of her affections, is it going to far to trip a two year old? What if I found out he’s three?


b. Do I sit Miss Emma down and explain to her that No. No, no, no sweet thing. We do not twitter and giggle and dance every time the boy walks into the room. You start doing that now and they’ll come to expect it. Just smile, bat your little eyes, and wait. And really, couldn’t you wait a little longer? Because, mommy is just not prepared to handle some stupid little boy stepping on your feelings.

Do you think it’s possible to teach a two year old to play hard to get? (which, so I’m clear, she better damn well be hard to get.)

I await further instructions.


Miss Britt

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