WWMBD: on what you want men to want

OMG I am late today. Between broken Internet and working and blah blah (insert shit you don’t care about here), I haven’t been online really since Thursday. I know!!

Thank God for WWMBD…

Hello Miss Britt,

I loved your Vagina Chronicle a few weeks back, by the way, you had me laughing my head off. I think it was one of your best posts. Good work.

Have you considered altering it your WWMBD a tiny bit to Ask Britt’s Vagina? I say this because you could soooo pull this off in a tasteful yet funny way. You are a person with morals and values and a good swear word vocabulary so it would be perfect. If anyone ever read my blog, I’d want to do it.

Here’s my question:

Dear Britt’s Vagina (or Aunt Flo or whatever you want to name it),

My husband has a four day weekend coming up and he has his heart set on taking us to the middle of freaking nowhere to go camping and fishing. How can I get him to reconsider and take me someplace with a full service spa in it instead? It would also be a bonus it he thought it was his idea, and not because I threatened divorce.

Thank you,

Pamper vs. Nature

Dear Pampered,

Ah the tricky business of manipulating our husbands…

First and foremost, I’d try chucking that whole idea. You don’t have to threaten divorce, just TELL HIM that you had a couple different ideas. SHOW HIM with brochures, blah blah blah. And? Wrack your fucking brain for even ONE reason why HE would enjoy himself more in a spa setting than the middle of nowhere.

Put yourself in his shoes. What is the benefit for him to scrap his plans in exchange for yours? Thoughtfully, in a not naggy, bitchy ass way, point those benefits out to him.

And if that doesn’t work?

Well, I try not to use The Secrets unless absolutely necessary. But if you simply must find yourself in a position to get a man to do something he’s not gung-ho about, remember the Old Faithfuls.

Tears.

Booze.

Sex.

In that order.

Good luck!!

Miss Britt

P.S. And that vagina thing? Not gonna happen. I can talk ABOUT my vagina, but I just don’t think I can get into an actual, real life Talking Vagina. But thanks.

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